GFNN
by Lady Zia
Summary: Gravity Falls News Network. We report anything & analyze everything within our fandom. Episode 2: We finish reviewing the Love God. Important messages at the end. Please R&R!
1. Chapter 1: The Love God Pt 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravity Falls nor CNN. I only own one OC, the rest belong to their respective owners. To those owners, please tell me if you have a problem of how their portrayed. Thank you & enjoy.

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><p>Lights faded in on seven people sitting in cushiony chairs. Five were ladies, one was a man. Bone chilling music started playing.<p>

"Welcome to the show." Ella & Cloud harmonically sang.

"Girls!" Cameron shouted. The music along with the two girls stopped. Ella cleared her throat;

"Good evening, fandom. I'm Ella," said the girl with a brown pony tail.

"I'm Jules." The boy said.

"I'm Cloud," one with long brown hair said.

"And I'm Lily!" another girl with long brown hair said.

"I'm Cameron." The girl with the longest brown hair inquired.

"I'm Ellen," a girl with blonde hair said.

"And I'm Madison." The last girl said. "Our top story tonight, The Love God. So, what did you guys think?"

"All I can say is," Ella began. "This was a really good episode. I especially loved the Woodstock parody, being raised by bands like these."

"Well, I wasn't to satisfied with it." Lily said. "I didn't like the references."

"Ok, maybe there was a few dirty references, but you have to admit, the way Alex Hirsch pulled that through the censors is amazing!" Jules giggled. "Like the three-way with Tyler, tipped iced tea, I don't know how he does it!" He burst into laughter along with Cameron. Ella, Lily, & Cloud giggled hysterically.

"Oh ha." Madison said. "I liked this episode, but the part that made and broke it for me was the Visions of Heartbreaks Past. It referenced MABEL AND MERMANDO! Ah! And then, Mermando betrayed Mabel. WHY!?"

"Could somebody get this girl some therapy!" Cloud shouted.

"I have to side with Lily," Ellen said. "Not the best episode, but for a different reason. I find it hard to believe that Robbie and Tambry won't last. You saw how they reacted before the potion!"

"Yes, but I believe that, is released from the spell, will make it. I think their love will become real. Quoting Dipper, 'They are kind of perfect for each other'." Ella stated.

"True, but to who do we owe their relation-" Lily began.

"It's 'to whom', not 'to who'." Jules stated.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Anyway, who do we owe their relationship too? The Love God. Since Mabel did it, it was a mistake. It won't last."

"No. Just no." Cameron said. "Ella's right. This has been set up since they were introduced. We all knew Wendy & Robbie wouldn't make it, we all knew Robbie would've come back to his friends after the breakup, we all knew Tambry would eventually get a boyfriend. This just makes sense."

"But think about how Nate feels. A girl I liked once dated one of my best friends. I hated him and her for a while, but were still best buddies." Jules added.

"Nate will get a girlfriend." Cloud joined in. "He's got great chances, there's probably more teenage girls in Gravity Falls." They cut to a break.

* * *

><p>They returned. "I don't think so." Lily said. "We've seen, like, all the residents of Gravity Falls."<p>

"No! No we haven't! There's more we haven't seen! How else would they add characters!" Ella shouted as she stood up.

"Bring them into town like our OC's! Make our stuff canon!" Ellen yelled in Ella's face.

"You want to go, girl? LET'S DO THIS!" she shoved the girl out of her face. Soon, Ella & Ellen were shoving each other out of each other's face, Jules and Cloud were in a hand to hand tackle, and Lily and Cameron were hitting each other with miscellaneous items. Madison, who was just sitting there, stood up & approached Ellen. She grabbed some skin by her neck, gently pulled, & caught the girl she just knocked out. Everyone stopped & stared, then fearfully returned to their seats. Ellen was carried off the set.

"I might have something that could help." She said calmly.

"Yeah?" Jules crankily said.

"We do this after we've reviewed all the other episodes." Madison said.

"Fine. We should get back to our episode." Cameron said.

"Let's break down the story next time, & now we do some fun tidbits, codes, & small plot details." Lily said. Everyone agreed.

"Ok. Well, we now know what the 'V' in Robbie V. means. And this, I think, is amazing. You know how in the Bill Wheel Robbie represents the heart, & hearts represent love? Well, since this is the second relationship we've seen him in, I think his last name is Valentino because Alex associates the character with love. This may cement the new relationship he's in. Robbie represents love in this show." Ella stated. Everyone blinked.

"Headcanon accepted!" Cloud shouted. "Next?"

Do you guys know what time it is?" Ella said.

"Trivia Time!" they all screamed.

"Coming up after the break." Ella finished.

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><p>"Let's begin!" Jules said when they returned. "Today, it's my turn to host this round!" he said. H pulled out his first card. "Cameron,"<p>

"Hi!" she said.

"We have a new writer on the show! What is his name?" Cameron thought for a moment.

"I want to say... John Weinstein."

"Oh! So close! It's Josh, not John."

"Darn." Cameron smacked her head. Jules picked up another card.

"Ella," she looked up. "Robbie writes & draws two specific kinds of each art. What are they?"

"Hmm... poetry, &, anime?" she said hesitantly.

"Correct!" he responded. "Now, Cloud."

"Yes?" she replied.

"Name the Founding Father Mabel had a crush on."

"Alexander, uh, I give up. Alexander H."

"Well, you only missed seven letters." Jules flipped the card over. "Madison, your turn." She looked nervous as Jules continued. "Name two people who appeared in this episode from Season 1." Madison broke into a cold sweat, then took a deep breath,

"Sev'ral Times &, the MultiBear." She responded.

"Correct, but the MultiBear isn't a person." He remarked.

"Bite me." Madison said snidely.

"Ok, last question. Alright, Lily, what does Mabel say when Robbie doesn't remember her?"

"Uh..., 'Remember me? I'm like girl Dipper."

"Correct!" Ella glanced at the clock.

"Ah! We're almost over! Are there an final thoughts?"

"Alright, thanks to our new writer, Josh Weinstein, Blind Ivan, the MultiBear, the Agents, Sev'ral Times, Mermando, & Melody have cameos. I love how Melody is still included, & how the writers, Alex & Josh, still take old characters & keep them relevant." Lily said.

"Though there are MANY mixed feelings about this episode, especially in our crew, I personally hope to witness more episodes written by him. Besides, I think he & Alex make the best team, for everything they got by the sensors!" Cameron giggled.

"Have a great day! Oh, and what do you think? Do you like our topics & what we thought of? What did you think of the episode? What are your theories & thoughts? Leave your ideas in the review section." Cloud said.

"Goodbye!" Cameron shouted.


	2. Chapter 2: The Love God Pt 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravity Falls, nor CNN. I am not rich. Most of the OCs featured are not mine. To the owners, if you do not like how they are portrayed, please let me know. Thank you & have a great day.

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><p>"Welcome back to the show!" Jules introduced.<p>

"I'm excited! Our first official episode!" Ella shrieked. "I don't count last time because..."

_Madison quietly stood up & walked into the commotion. As she approached Ellen, she reached out, grabbed her neck, gently pulled, & caught the girl she just put out._

"Ugh!" Ellen shuddered. "Don't remind me." Madison smirked & leaned back.

"Today's episode, we'll start the reviewing of the Love God!" Madison said.

"Let's begin!" Cloud said. "So, we start off with Dipper and Mabel hanging out with the teens minus Robbie. They're clouding watching... in, the cemetery?" Cloud said confused.

"I have a problem with this. Why? It's always been depressing. I couldn't keep myself together laying on dead people." Cameron shuddered.

"Anyway," Lily said as she rolled her eyes. "Wendy explains to the twins the Woodstick Festival. Then moaning is heard."

"AHH!" Ella screeched. "A, ghost?"

"No." Jules said. "The teens follow the noise & discover Robbie sitting in an open grave."

"WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BODY!?" Madison screamed.

"I have NO idea!" Ellen said.

"Could we stop counting the plotholes?" Cloud said. "Anyway, the show reveals Robbie is too in love to ever let go. He wants Wendy, & is putting her on too high a pedestal to see tat he can do better."

"Why is that, hypocrite?" Ella said.

"Wendy isn't perfect. He thinks she's so mellow, yet she's extremely stressed. He also, only, loves her for her looks."

"Loser." Lily muttered. "So, Mabel then reveals her need to have everybody happy. We go back to the Shack, & Wendy apologizes about Robbie. She believes he's a lost cause. So Mabel thinks about setting him up with a new girl."

"Outside, Stan, while putting a clown wig on a yeti, notices the signs of Woodstick. He freaks out, & pulls out a box of MANY weapons. Soos comes out & saves the gallon people's lives. He suggests to Stan to get more in touch with young people." Cameron said.

"Back with Mabel, she goes to Robbie's house, & we see his last name, which helps the Headcanon I released last time." Ella smirked.

Madison took over," We find out Robbie's disgust for the Pines family, especially Dipper. We also see that he has many knives, writes poetry, & draws amazing anime. After lots of pandering, Robbie finally agrees to Mabel's help. And Mabel, being the- girl that she is, has a model of Gravity Falls & it's citizens carved out of wood. Creepy."

"Meanwhile, Dipper and the teens prepare for Woodstick. Lee & Nate are duck-taping lots of junk on Thompson. Since it was Dipper's idea, they all congratulate him, then he's carried off on Lee's back." Ellen stated.

"Tambry gets a text inviting her to a blind date." Cloud began. "She goes, & unhappily finds Robbie near the source. But, the feeling is mutual, and when Robbie orders food to go, Mabel is devastated."

"But," Jules said. "A man known as 'The Love God' enters, he put people together like no tomorrow. Mabel talks to him, & he reveals that he's an ACTUAL love god. And things get worse as she outright takes one of his potions."

"Mabel sneaks into the kitchen, pours the potion on Robbie's "to go" chili fries. Robbie AND Tambry both eat the fries, then fall madly in love." Ella said.

Cameron sighed. "And there's 2 things about this scene that really grind my gears. The first one, even though we know why it happened from Society of the Blind Eye, the chef just let Mabel pour the potion on. I was like 'UGH!' Secondly, Tambry put down her phone. Enough said."

Ellen rolled her eyes. "Anywho, when Mabel returns & announces to the Woodstick-ready teens that Robbie & Tambry are together, everyone gets upset. Allow us to demonstrate." The screen rolled to the cast of GFNN dressed as the characters; Jules as Dipper, Cameron as Mabel, Ella as Thompson, Madison as Wendy, Cloud as Lee, & Lily as Nate.

CAMERON: Oh, I don't think she'll be joining us. She & Robbie took a trip to SMOOCHVILLE!

LILY: Wait, Robbie & Tambry? This can't be happening! He knew I liked her!

CLOUD: What! You told Robbie you liked Tambry?

LILY: Well you would tease me about it!

CLOUD: _hits Lily _That's what we do, genius!

MADISON: Oh! Oh! This is so like Tambry! Go behind my back & date my ex! I'm gonna rip her highlights out!

_Madison, Lily & Cloud angrily walk away_

JULES: Wait! Guys! Comeback!

ELLA: No! Wait! Where are you going? NOT MY MAILBOX!

LILY: _punches mailbox _Ow!

ELLA: _turns to twins _What did you just do?!

CAMERON: I just thought they'd be good together.

JULES: Yeah! What about the gang?

ELLA: Yeah well thanks to you, there is no gang! I let them pick on me for years! I have no friends, & neither do you! _stomps away_

"Well, that's an example of how many hormones you experience when your a teen!" Cameron chuckled. The others returned & sat down.

Lily began." Mabel tells Dippers about the spell, then Dipper has to burn his outfit fort Woodstick."

"At the festival," Jules said. "Stan is having Soos make a balloon, with a lack of attention to safety." He chuckled.

Cloud took the baton. "Later, Thompson drags Lee Nate and Wendy to the festival, but they all walk away after seeing Robbie & Tambry do that weird couple's thing. So when Dipper & Mabel sneak in, they run to the Love God's van & find the potion they need: Anti-Love. Then-"

"Then Love God appears & scolds them." Ella interrupts. "The twins run away, which leads to-"

HANDLEBAR BROS: We mustache you to move!

"A MUSTACHE PUN! I have the BIGGEST love-hate relationship with these. This one, is actually kind of funny." She smiled.

"Thanks for interrupting Cloud." Ellen sneered. "So, while Dipper & Mabel are running from the Love God, Stan & Soos release the 'I HEART KIDS' balloon. But the H & R fall, making it say 'I EAT KIDS'. The balloon begins burning & descends onto the Love God."

"Before that, Love God conjures Mabel's past crushes, including Sev'ral Times, Mermando, Gabe Benson, Norman, &..." Madison paused. "Alexander Hamilton?"

"Then, the Love God gives them the potion, & Mabel tries hard to undo the couple. But Robbie is happy & thankful, & she can't do it. And the teens reunite throught the power of..." Cameron said.

"THOMPSON!" they all shouted.

"And Robbie & Wendy make up." Lily quickly added.

"So, that's the Love God. What did you think? You like the episode? Is there anything we missed? Will you have a merry Christmas? Leave your response in the reviews! Bye!" Jules smiled.

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><p>Ella, Cloud, &amp; Lily were sitting down.<p>

"Hi." Ella began. "So we all had fun tonight, but there's many things that aren't fun. One of them, is under-aged drinking."

"Recently, one of our friends & colleagues named Ameliana, age 13, has been drunk several times in her life."

"We don't want this to continue, so please, demote the actions of under-age alcohol abuse." Cloud finished.

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><p>The entire cast of GFNN was standing in front of the camera. Jules was dressed as Santa, &amp; the girls wore differently colored Santa hats.<p>

"Happy Holidays from everyone at GFNN!" They shouted. Also, the next update won't be until Jan. 2nd! I'm going on vacation! Merry Christmas!


End file.
